Today as I drove into the college parking lot and headed towards the fitness center to go lap swimming, I noticed signs saying 'The Muskie Show.' Hmm, I thought, muskie? The only 'muskie' I could think of was the big, ugly fish, but why would there be a 'show' about said fish?
The lot was jammed with pick-up trucks and SUV's, and on the frigid trek to the fitness center I noticed many folks wearing baseball caps. I began thinking maybe this was indeed a show devoted to a large, unnattractive fish. Upon entering the building and observing that the entire crowd had baseball caps on (part of the uniform of the American fisherman) I discarded my doubts and gave in to the realization that hundreds of people had paid money to go to a show starring an uncomely, untasty, aquatic creature.
Typical Muskie Enthusiasts
The swimming pool and the gymnasiums are on basement level--that's where I was headed and that's where the muskie show was taking place. One has the option of taking the elevator, but I take a narrow staircase. In my haste to get away from the crowds mingling upstairs and into the women's locker room, I failed to notice that the stairs were very slick from all the traffic.
On the second tier of stairs mid-way down, my feet went out from under me and I fell.
I had been grasping the handrail with my right hand, and I don't think I let go as I went thumping down what must have only been about 4 stairs. My left hip took the brunt of the fall and both ankles and my left wrist took the impact of "braking." The hip immediately began to throb. Amazingly, given how many people were in the building, there was only one on the stairs with me. Behind me was an Asian fellow sans baseball cap, so I don't think he was a muskie devoteé. He asked me if I was okay and I quickly responded with an affirmative thank you. At that point I wasn't really sure how okay I was, but nothing was broken, nor was I bleeding, the two criteria that I've always applied to 'Is it serious?,' so I headed on into the women's locker room.
I already had my suit on under my clothes so it didn't take me long to get into the pool. The hip continued to throb, but I didn't feel much else until the third lap (yeah, I count 'em), at which point my right ankle started pulsing in pain. Following that, was my right shoulder which must have been yanked as I clutched the handrail to stop myself from going ass-over-teakettle down the entire flight of stairs.
Fortunately, the lack of needing to bear much weight whilst swimming was in my favor.
My mind was taken off my woes somewhat when I caught sight of a group of muskie fans, rods in hand, on their way to approach the lifeguard. I couldn't hear much of the conversation, but I did hear the word 'ain't' a lot. Come to find out, they wished to cast their lines into the pool! Okay, so there wasn't anyone on the side of the pool that they wanted to play-fish in, but Christ Almighty, don't people have any inhibitions?!
The Muskie-ites stood about 6 feet from the end of my lane for about 15 minutes, playing with their rods and reels and lures and what-have-you. When they were finished, they started on their way, clomping down the length of my lane wearing their big, dirty, shit-kickin' boots whilst the lifeguard scanned the pool to make sure they hadn't left behind any fishing paraphernalia.
I'm nothing to gawk at, but I could feel them taking a good look at my Speedo-clad body, as they made their way to exit through the men's locker room.
My damaged body parts were speaking much too loudly right then for me to consider the notion that they were inbred, redneck asshats.
I managed to complete my workout, relishing the thought of a hot shower, but dreading the thought of the hell-walk through the parking lot in the crisp 20-degree-with-a-wind-chill-of-zero weather.
I came home and warmed up while the hurt parts of my body throbbed with more gusto--both wrists, one elbow, both ankles and my hip. It's a bitch to type. It's worse to walk.
My husband is working tonight, and my son has a video game that he's entranced by, so I'm going to make myself cozy and watch the following film--which somehow I missed on it's first run. I'm intruiged because I've never read of a character in a film described as a 'spunky extraterrestrial.'
120 mins.
A cop (Joe Cortese) and a spunky extraterrestrial (Maryam d'Abo) track a killer alien on the loose. Pilot for the short-lived series. Rick Baker and John Dykstra won Emmys for designing the creature and the special effects. Mandy: Kim Delaney. Frank: George Dzundza. Estabrook: Robert Webber. Victor: Gregory Sierra. Emmy for special effects.
Cast: George Dzundza, Joe Cortese, Maryam d'Abo, Kim Delaney
Category: Movie, Sci-fi
Release Year: 1988
Ha-ha-ha, Vanessa and lakkris.
There might be something to your theories, Besides, I'd rather believe in extra-terrestrial fish or stair snakes, than that I'm a clumsy ox.
Posted by: Cyn | January 12, 2004 at 07:36 PM
glad that you are okay... gotta watch out for those stair snakes, cousins of the snowski snakes, those little bastards just jump out and grab you and then disappear.
greetings from LA!
Posted by: lakkris | January 12, 2004 at 10:04 AM
I think exercising right away, mad as it may seem, probably helped, too.
Also, I think the muskie is an extra terrestrial fish, that picked up on your psychic waves of scorn and ridicule, and made you slip on those stairs till you believe. Possibly.
Posted by: Vanessa | January 12, 2004 at 04:40 AM
Thanks for your concern--all of you. Things are much better today. Ironically, the frigid weather must have been in my favor--my Nanook of the North attire seems to have cushioned me rather well (and :cough: my own padding.)
Posted by: Cyn | January 11, 2004 at 12:46 PM
Damn, I'm sorry you hurt yourself, but I'm even more sorry you ended up at the Muskie Lover Convention.
Posted by: Perlito | January 11, 2004 at 10:32 AM
Er...is it just me or do muskies resemble circumsized...hmm nm it MUST be me....
Posted by: Anne | January 11, 2004 at 08:47 AM
Cyn, ice those body parts and stay out of the pool till they no longer throb! Ice for 15 minutes at a time, 3 times a day. And you could soak in an Epson salt bath for 45+ minutes to relieve the pain as well. (Epson salt is great for soar limbs). Dr. Aguilar
Posted by: Rose | January 11, 2004 at 12:54 AM